My Mega Exciting Life: Old Times in the Big Apple

Yet another short blog post BUT I promise to make up for it next week!

A couple of years ago, dear dear dear dear dear dear dear (thanks Adam Carolla) friend Kristina Canan got engaged! We started planning an epic bachelorette party for us and company in the thriving metropolis of New York City! By the time we finished planning, she'd called off the engagement.

Ahem. What to do, what to do... What would Emily Post say about canceling a bachelorette party when an engagement is called off? I KNOW! Have a "YEA, Didn't Marry The Wrong Man Party!!!"

This was only my third trip to New York, and only the second I'd stayed overnight. I confess - I was terrified a bit. I left all my good jewelry at home, and upon arrival at the hotel I made Kristina memorize a rape attack plan for our room: the unattacked would run quickly out the room, pull the fire alarm and hose, turn on said hose and squirt the assailant out the hotel window (this is also after I made her memorize our terrorist attack plan on the airplane: in the event of a terrorist attack, we would double team the assailant - she'd go high, I'd go low. She'd work on face scratching with all her might while I would go all out at his junk. No doubt we'd get hurt but I truly think we'd prevail in the end. It would have to be a VERY COORDINATED, silent attack - I'm talking one look, a miniscule nod and GO!!!!! I think a double team like that would stump any terrorist assailant).

i need to see the safety protocol agenda for the weekend, plskthnks...

I also was terrified when these crazy girls all followed this strange woman, who handed us off to a strange man, who handed us off to another strange man, who loaded us in an elevator I KNOW was not permitted by the city and took us up and let us off in a room of with all drywalls and no windows but four doors and a cat in a corner with a man eating noodles out of a bowl by the light of one lamp with no shade. We were shoved in a room full of designer purses, but I didn't buy anything. Buying a fake Gucci to shove in my real Marc Jacobs bag just seemed wrong...

i don't know who took this, but that's the back of my terrified head. i was seriously scared. i knew i'd live, but i had a feeling i would either get hurt or arrested. fortunately neither occurred.

But - to begin at the beginning, Kristina and I started the weekend off right with a pleasant champagne lunch in Central Park! We sat under a nice tree and had a nice lunch when two nice people came up asked us to take their photo. After a quick meet and greet, we found out that they used to live in Manhattan, one on each side of Central Park. They would meet for dates under that tree we were eating at. They married some time later and moved away from New York, but every anniversary they made a special trip to NYC to meet under the tree ADORABLE! Here's the photo they took of us:

we weren't on a date though. i give that disclaimer because we were mistaken for lesbians about four times over the weekend. i left my wedding ring at home safe from muggers remember?

We had a great time in the city, but we didn't do anything stereotypically New York until the end of the trip. We had a great time visiting, going to clubs and bars, shopping, and especially eating. After a HUGE lunch one day we walked past a Pinkberry store. I made everyone stop in their tracks so I could go in and buy a frozen yogurt.

Jenny Mowrer had a few months beforehand come home from visiting sister Cera in LA preaching high praises over this new frozen yogurt called Pinkberry. She said that it was so good they went at least once a day to Pinkberry, and sometimes twice. Jenny's no slouch so when I saw a Pinkberry in the city, I was ALL OVER IT.

And here we have me after one eagerly-anticipated bite of Pinkberry:

over, RATED! *clap, clap! clap, clap, clap!* seriously, it tastes like ice cream made from buttermilk. jenny, you still owe me $4.

Lastly, we did something bona fide New York-ey. We went on a water tour to see the installation of urban waterfalls (same guy that puts a million yards of fabric on any building of significance that sits still) and SAW THE STATUE OF LIBERTY. Again, have been to NYC three times and only seen the statue from a distance. I turned my head and it was RIGHT THERE. I cried a little - it was terribly exciting. Here is me upon eyeing the statue on the boat: