I. Am. Exhausted.
Last Wednesday, Mama and Dipsey had their annual "We're Too Old For This, Never Doing It Again Kuzzin's Kamp!" Every year, they invite all the little cousins in the family over and spend two days doing crafts, going to the lake/pool, visiting, having a sleep over, etc. The children love it; me included. WHAT? What are you looking at? Shut up; I'm a little cousin! Hmph!
We had so much fun!
I got there after work and immediately fell into the excitement. Max got his first black eye by running (literally) into Patrick! Patrick, 1; Max, 0. I tried to get him to let me get a photo of his shiner but he was having none of it. Again, literally; see?
who you think you are, the pa-pa, paparazzi?
After a nice supper of hamburgers and mac and cheese the children wanted dessert. Dipsey was prepping the fire pit, so I took the four oldest children with me to the grocery store to procure s'mores supplies. On the way there and back, we entertained most of west Knoxville by rolling down the windows and singing Lady Gaga and Ke$sha at the top of our lungs. Um... do I have to say it again? Ok - LITERALLY.
When we got back it was raining so we waited out the rain by listening to more songs on my iPod. It turned into a dance party - whee!!!
bobby nicole and ashton cut a rug
Then, someone (who knows who) came up with the brilliant beyond BRILLIANT idea of having a dance contest! Spencer declared himself the judge and we all got started.
check out andy's fierce moves
bobby nicole breaks it down to eenie meanie
mama shows off her moves to man of constant sorrow
ashton struts her stuff
Even Dipsey gets into the groove and dances a few steps a la New Orleans funeral processional style:
wadda ladda ladda!
And you KNOW if there's dancing involved I am front and center:
shake it! don't break it! took your mama nine months to make it! seriously. check out my face. i am INTO it. i take my dancing very seriously. i'm surprised mtv hasn't called yet.
I insisted on a one-point deduction because I had been to way more dance parties than anyone else in the room (ahem, garage). Imagine my surprise when....
spencer announces that andy and i are TIED for first place!
What happened next was not of my doing. I SWEAR. Spencer announced that the only way to declare an ultimate winner in this challenge... was to have a dance-off. Folks... I love a dance-off. And I've only been in one, and I went on to win the Miss Brick House Contest at the KA house in 1995! Mama and Daddy, I know you're proud. You're welcome. That college edukashun was worth every penny.
i know it shows in my face, but i totally danced my hardest. actually, it was HARD - spencer had declared that we dance to 'forever young' which is totes undanceable and i had the uncensored version on my ipod and kept having to remember when racy lines came on and shout real loud over them so the children wouldn't hear. that took a LOT of concentration. mama kept giving me frowny faces when naughty lines were sung, but other than that i don't think anyone noticed.
Again, I insisted on my one point deduction. Hey, I bet I drive a CAR a lot better than those kids, yo. I conceded victory to Andy by half a point. Hey, at least I'm still Miss Brick House. OWWW!!!
S'mores time! We head to the Smoking Parlor.
it was still raining so we all huddled in the parlor to stay dry. i still smell like woodsmoke.
we found these HUGE marshmellows at the store! they were the size of apples!
here i am pre-toasting
and post
patrick digs in in a big way
Next, craft time!
i show the andy and patrick how to weave a pot holder while the girls get ready for bed and max heads for the hills
see? andy wanted it but i took it for me instead. bwah, ha ha ha ha!
Next: nighty nite-nite time!
dipsey and max saw logs
It was quite rambunctious, and I am practical so I sipped my toddy as such to avoid a spill:
sippy cup
A few nights later, I sipped my toddy from another interesting vessel:
mason jar
My friend Amanda is getting married next weekend! She and her partner John are getting married at a sustainable living community in the Sequatchie Valley called the Sequatchie Valley Institutute. Their Web site is here. I'm her maid of honor and felt it my maiden duty to help her ready her wedding site pre-Big Day. Well. That and she's fun to be around. It's selfish, really. She invited me up and asked me to help her prep for her WEDDING!!!!
Usually, the place is packed packed packed full of people. This weekend? DESERTED. Everyone was at Bonnaroo so we had the place to ourselves! We showed up to get a nice night's sleep and hit the ground running in the morning!
They had turned the power off since no one was there. No matter! Amanda had a headlamp and I had a flashlight so we bumbled to the third floor of her reception structure to visit and relax in the dark for a few hours before hitting the hay. Imagine our surprise when....
my flashlight hit the disco ball and the entire third floor lit up. we sat for hours and gossiped basking in the light of the disco ball.
Amanda and Megan say nite-nite!
giggle giggle giggle - there's no power - giggle giggle
The next morning I get up and go for a run. I took off and the house dog, Mia, took off with me. I've never had a dog run with me before and it was a bit unsettling at first. At the end of my run I was totally into it and yelling for her to keep up and quit smelling things. I think she liked it too because she didn't leave my SIDE the rest of the weekend. Amanda started calling her my new girlfriend. (I think Amanda was secretly jealous.)
my new gf kia blazes the trail. YES I RAN WITH MY CAMERA.
Speaking of new friends...
this is moonshine the kitty cat. he's as crossed-eyed as they make them and as sweet as pie.
he bunked with me and amanda. tee hee! sleepy kitty, sleepy amanda...
here's moonshine whippin' tail on my new gf, kia. seriously they played so cute that i gave mr. smith a play by play the day before. it was like, "moonshine's between my legs pretending kia doesn't exist. she doesn't fall for the play and COMES IN FROME THE LEFT! he fakes right and goes BACK between my legs, he's shedding on my sweaty legs but kia's not deterred! she goes to bite his head like an apple but he FAKES! he rounds to the left and swats him southpaw style!" it was quite entertaining.
i think this cat must have an agent somewhere, because i literally, LITERALLY (there's that word again) saw him like twelve times a day and wanted to take his picture. here he is lounging on a rock wall. i won't bore you with details and more pics but SERIOUSLY. this cat is DEAD SEXY. he knows his audience.
i have never seen a lizard of this color in this region! he had this crazy neck gig thing going on too - tried to get a good pic of that and failed... sorry....
Although I made new friends... I also met a new archenemy.
THE GOOSE
On to other things! Here is the foyer of the big house; it's called Moonshadow:
left side - see the spider stained glass? there were two real spiders nesting outside! it was cute.
right side - isn't it PRETTY? my front door is dumb in comparison.
kitchen - full of light in the day even without power!
fireplace
skylight above fireplace!
pantry
salve for itching in the bathroom
And on to the outside:
shiitake mushroom logs! how COOL is that?
the garden
here is where i took my baths!
here is where you parked your dry things while you bathed
And here is where they are going to have their reception!
this is called barking beetle. it was built from pines felled by the pine beetle that chewed off all the bark off the trees - hence the name barking beetle. the disco ball is on the third floor, and we discovered a mud dauber's nest on the disco ball the next day! how appropriate.
The next morning, Amanda figured out how to make coffee sans power:
mortar and pestle, yo
And makes a scrum-de-le-umptious breakfast, SANS POWER:
sausage, egg spinach and cheese toast sandwich
Next, we worked, worked, worked, worked, worked, worked!
here we are pre-work! see how smiley we are?
we made these old windows into chalkboards for signs to tell peeps what's up
I swept every inch of Barking Beetle (Amanda was in charge of spider webs/spiders - good division of labor since I'm terrified of spiders) and my feet were FILTHY after sweeping.
i refused to go eat lunch in the house until i washed them clean. here i am washing up in the fountain in the front yard!
We cleaned Earth Shag - this is where Tommy and Kristina and I are going to bunk for the weekend next weekend:
no one had been living there recently so we swept it clean, pulled out and beat/sunned the mattresses, and scrubbed the floor. even in the heat of the day the walls were so thick it was cool inside! like a thermos! HOW DO THEY DO THAT?!
four-leafy outside earth shag
double four-leafy outside earth shag
Amanda's sister Emily shows up to help!
da goils.
AAAAAHHHH!!!!
big jerk goose and his lackey duck give me the eye... seriously, that mo-fo chased me all weekend.
But then I remembered...
my gf kia. i said the word and she scattered that goose!
I grant you - I did not take a TON of pics to validate my claim that we worked our tails off - hey. I was WORKING. No time to snap pics. But trust me when I say, WE WORKED. Here is a photo of my sad little hand the evening after:
oooooowww (i'm a whiner) and that's one of THREE!
But I had fun despite my wounds!
here i am alone in the kitchen on our last night
and of course we brush our teeth because we practice good hygiene
The next morning... I confront one of my fears. I asked John show me how to light, with FIRE, a gas stove. I succeed. Or he does, one....
i cook while amanda and john make wedding plans
i cooked this on FIRE i stared MYSELF!
Next week: Wedding Day. I'm confident there's an epic blog post in my future! Stay tuned!!!
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